Get Toasted: A BSG Drinking Game

As an FYI to the Seven Loyal Readers who aren’t full-fledged Geeks and thus unaware, tonight’s the Finale of Battlestar Galactica. Since I know you were wondering, they’ve found Earth but it was all nuked and depressing. Kara Thrace’s Special Destiny is still unclear. And the human population count has dwindled to numbers that make incest increasingly acceptable. As a Girl Geek, I, of course, plan to spend the night on the couch, wearing my BSG tee, and twittering spoilers to all my Tivo-using friends. Also, I’m Officially Predicting The Following:

  • Everybody returns to Kobil, thus starting the whole frakkin’ cycle over again.
  • Kara’s daddy is Daniel, the boxed and aloof 13th Cylon.
  • Kara and Lee finally do the Horizontal Tango in a moment of post-saving-humanity bliss, despite Kara being a semi-Cylon.
  • Anders never gets out of the Goo Bath.
  • Adama dies in a moment of suicidal heroic splendor, but only after Roslin finally succumbs to The Slowest Killing Breast Cancer In The Galaxy and goes to the Big Gods In The Sky.

And because I like to commemorate Television Events by posting a drinking game, I’ve developed a sure-fire way to become blotto before Starbuck saves the entire frakking universe during the second hour. So, BSGers, write your will on 8-sided paper, make peace with the Gods, and settle in for liver doom.

ONE DRINK:

  • Adama takes off or puts on his glasses dramatically
  • Adama uses his Glare of Death; bonus drink if Cottle deflects it with his own Scowl of Intense Disapproval
  • Adama does something “captainy,” like crushing walnuts in his hand or building a model ship
  • Adama has a Moment with Starbuck
  • Adama has a Moment with Lee
  • Boomer tries to prove she’s really nice and not evil
  • Boomer is angry/unhappy/depressed/suicidal
  • Gaius is talking to Ghost Six
  • Roslin makes a heartfelt and inspiring impromptu speech to the Fleet
  • Starbuck and Lee Adama stare at each other for non-work-related reasons
  • Thigh yells, “Gods Damnit!”

TWO DRINKS:

  • Somebody says a multi-word curse using Frak (e.g. mother frakker)
  • Anytime there’s an 8-sided paper item
  • Somebody is airlocked; extra sip if Roslin commands it
  • They spin up the FTL only to have it initially fail, then miraculously work at the Very Last Possible Second
  • Lady McTigh ever sleeps with her husband again
  • Six isn’t showing cleavage
  • Starbuck demonstrates a previously unknown but still nifty talent/ability/skill
  • Starbuck hops into bed on a barely-considered whim
  • Tori tries to get her own way

THREE DRINKS:

  • Adama cries; chug if it’s over Roslin’s deathbed
  • Anders wakes up
  • Lee stops being a self-righteous douche
  • Starbuck does her open-mouthed hyena laugh
  • Starbuck is happy
  • There’s a scene on a Fleet ship besides the Galactica

CHUG:

  • They unveil Daniel or any other extra Cylon models
  • Galactica collapses
  • Humanity does not survive
  • The entire series leaps ahead a year
  • Baltar is revealed as the traitor who betrayed the Colonies and actually can’t weasel out of it
  • Dualla resurrects
  • Ghost Six’s existence is confirmed and revealed

BONUS:

  • Anyone says any variant of “frak” besides the multi-word curse: just kind of wave at the screen
  • Lee in a towel: Thank the Gods and then drink until your pulse returns to normal
  • Anytime Grace Parker appears: shout which character you think she is (Eight, Sharon, Athena, Boomer or Other) and if you’re correct, hand your beer to someone who got it wrong
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6 Responses to “Get Toasted: A BSG Drinking Game”

  1. emma Says:

    I’m only bummed that this drinking game was not introduced 4 seasons ago. I could have spent many more Friday nights (Sat afternoons depending upon my TiVo reliance) happily drunk.

    Hope the finale doesn’t disappoint! So say we all.

    There’s always the DVDs. After all, all this has happened before, and all this will happen again.

  2. flipflopsintherain Says:

    So Pithy wasn’t kidding when she called your Geek Date an Event….

    Nope, she spoke true.

  3. lyssabits Says:

    “Kara Thrace’s Special Destiny”.. you don’t by any chance read the Television Without Pity recaps of the show, do you?

    Also, “Thigh yells, “Gods Damnit!””?? Fruedian slip? 😉

    Kara Thrace’s Special Destiny is from season 3, I think…But no, I don’t read them…And I always, always, always want to put the extra “h” in there.

  4. pithycomments Says:

    @Flippy: Imagine this were the series finale for One Shrub Hill. It’s that important.

    I’m still holding out hope for The Towel.

    Why stop at The Towel? How about some full frontal? I mean, this is cable, right?

  5. lyssabits Says:

    I only asked because the recapper from that site also calls it Kara Thrace’s Special Destiny, and likes to wax poetic about it (and everything else on that show) so I was wondering if the similar phrasing was a coincidence or not. 😉 I personally love the recaps, but my best friend and I have a healthy disagreement over whether Jacob is a Genius (my position) or Completely Insane (her position.)

    I haven’t watched last week’s episode yet. My sister is coming up this weekend and I’m saving the two-hour bonanza for when she gets here. Squee!

    Hope you enjoyed it!

  6. Herb Says:

    My BSG drinking game involves taking a drink everytime someone on my blogroll posts about this fracking show. No wonder I spend most Fridays and Saturdays pickled. Thank god this show is over. It is over, right?

    You’re safe. At least until the S4 DVDs come out.

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