Daniel Craig, aka The MOST FANTASTICALLY GOREGOUS JAMES BOND EVER, was on The Today Show this morning. Of course I was late to work because I had to drool all over my TV screen watch. But then it occurred to me. Daniel Craig, who should be mandated by law to always look like this:
Yowzah!
Actually vaguely resembles this:
Thank God for evolution.
Well, what a Neanderthal would look like after a zillion years of Darwinism. And with a haircut. (Come on! It’s the nose. And eyes. And forehead. Seriously. Ignore the glistening abs and look again. You’ll agree.)
My fantasy world? Crushed just a bit.
PS – Who names a movie the Quantum of Solace? I have never heard those words used in an actual sentence. Is the title a fancified British thing? Because really, I personally think the producer just opened up a thesaurus, found synonyms for “amount” and “comfort” and called it a day.
November 12, 2008 at 4:12 pm
The ears were the first thing I noticed. He looks like the Mad Magazine kid all grown up.
November 12, 2008 at 5:13 pm
Okay – I have never seen a Bond movie in its entirety and none of the Bond Boys give me a lady woody, but I can tell you that Quantum of Solace is the title of a short story written by Ian Fleming – that doesn’t explain the inanity of it, but yeah…whatever.
November 12, 2008 at 5:23 pm
In defense of inanity, all Bond films are titled from Ian Flemming’s work. Having seen nearly all Bond films (not something that is necessarily a source of pride,) I can say that not only is Daniel Craig the best Bond since Sean Connery, but they owners of the franchise have finally hired some decent writers as Casino Royale was the best Bond film in at least two dozen years.
November 12, 2008 at 5:25 pm
At last! Meaning behind the name!
November 12, 2008 at 5:51 pm
Restaurantrefugee — Hee, that was almost exactly what my husband said when we walked out of Casino Royale.
“Who woke up one morning and said, ‘even though every crap Bond movie we’ve made makes eleventy gajillon dollars, let’s put in some effort and make this one good.’?”
However he can’t figure out who’s responsible, because apparently all the writers, directors and producers have worked on the bad Bond films as well.
It is, however, a stupid name, even if Ian Flemming did think it up.
November 12, 2008 at 7:31 pm
Watch the movie and you will understand the name. Think of the definition of quantum leap: sudden large increase or advance. Now put solace instead of leap and you get a defintion of: sudden large relief or comfort. Having seen the movie the violence level has jumped and Mr. Craig playing Bond is one angery brittish bastard. Its all about revenge and pay back for the death of the Vespa in the last movie.
Just don’t go to the movie with any grudges or slight anger cause you’ll want to act on it. Leave the cell phones off for atleast an hour after the movie cause you will call the boss and tell him/her exactly where to place the TPS report and then threaten them and their families with physical harm.
Its a great Bond movie, but very edgy and violent; no smiles or winks when beating the bad guy.
Please note that I’m still buzzed by the movie and never intended for this to be a rant of any length.
November 13, 2008 at 3:17 am
I think I’ve mentioned my Quantum of Sexual Solace theory to you before,
Englishman (Daniel Craig) = sexually aroused as long as a switch and the headmaster are part of foreplay
Englishman = not good in the sack
Ancillary Sexual Quantum Theorems:
Irishman (Pierce Brosnan) = good in the sack when sober
Irishman = rarely sober
Irishman = rarely good in the sack
Scotsman (Sean Connery) = good in the sack if you are wearing a wool jumper and watching Shaun the Sheep video
Scotsman = rarely good in the sack
November 15, 2008 at 7:40 pm
I can not ignore the glistening abs. I CAN NOT!