My World Has Shattered or the TLP ends

There is a rift in the greatness which was the popular (with me and ten other people) local band known as The Toledo Luggage Problem. Just as they were on the verge of rawk stardom, it seems the group has parted ways. I’m pretty upset about this. Why else will I ever go the the snazzy Dolphin Lounge? Granted, I might go just so I can see my peeing self reflected in the mirrored wall after I down a couple of $5 Coors Lights I can only pay cash for. But still, it won’t be the same without the TLP playing in the background.

And without the TLP, I won’t be an Official Groupie anymore. Heck, I’m not even a member of anything besides the Britney Spears Is A Wreck and I Love It Club. I’ve always wanted to say, “I was there for the beginning…” and I could when the TLP were still together. I never anticipated saying, “…and the end.” That just sucks. Really, I would have been fine with being on E! True Hollywood Story and talking about throwing undies at the guitarist and making google eyes at Jim the Teddy Bear Hunk. Dream quashed.

I know the fans are heartbroken but as with all things in life, we will eventually move on. Still, a little piece of my musical soul will forever be devoted to The Toledo Luggage Problem. And I’ll never think of “Stacy’s Mom” the same way again.


2 Responses to “My World Has Shattered or the TLP ends”

  1. Jimmy (the bald horny teddy bear) Says:

    Not so fast my friend! TTLP has absolutely, positively not broken up! We are merely going through a “transitional phase.” I would expect a woman of your intelligence to be able to distinguish between the two.

    Fear not, fair Katherine. You will once again be able to throw panties at TTLP!!!

  2. Katherine Says:

    Yes! I was recently updated, and hear there are various names being tossed about. Personally, I would go with the Akron Baggage Incident. “The ABI” sounds like an STD. I find humor in this.

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