The Sidekick

I think that Batman was the ultimate, best, coolio-est superhero of all superheros. And frankly, it wasn’t just because he had the Batmobile. It had a lot to do with how hunky Robin was. Thus, in the great tradition of great superheros having cute sidekicks, I decided that Bionic Kitty needed an adorable buddy. Needless to say, she was not too keen on this idea.

A little over a week ago, I brought home Number Two. I was no more than two inches in the door with the cat carrier than Bionic Kitty knew something was up. She came barreling to the door, took one look at the poor, innocent kitten and started to throw a fit. In that moment, I learned what a hissy fit really is. There was spitting, hissing, and extraordinary hair-standing-on-end behavior. I eventually got past Bionic Kitty, but not before she tried to take off my arm with her teeth. I dashed for the stairs, trying to protect myself and the kitten by locking Number Two in the office. Miraciously, we made it, but Bionic Kitty is wiley. She quickly realized that she could scare Number Two sh!tless if she threw herself at the door repeatedly and hissed.

This continued for two days. It was cat fight hell, with Bionic Kitty trying to establish dominance and Number Two running for dear life. Then, suddenly, they declared a truce. I’m still not sure what happened, but I think peace returned when Bionic Kitty realized that despite her attemps to crush Number Two with her massive weight, she would not win. Number Two, while tiny in comparison, has a secret weapon: claws. Bionic Kitty lost hers several months ago, and Number Two once again brought this to her attention. Number Two also has a few extra claws since she is “mitten pawed.” Bionic is still the alpha in the relationship, but Number Two keeps her on her toes. It’s the best of superhero relationships; Bionic Kitty is still the (questionable) brains, but Number Two is the cute one.


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